2 things

1. Owen spilled a glass of water on the mac and it died. Don't worry, it was quick and painless. So when the mac died all my pictures went with it, only Firedog at Circuit City says for 99.99 they can save the hard drive. The new mac is currently set to be delivered on the 30th.

2. Went to the ER again tonight. I can't seem to stay away from that place for long. As a matter of fact, when I handed the lady my insurance card she glanced at it and handed it right back, saying "Oh, we already have your information on file!" Anyway, Skylar decided to try to do a swan dive off Pops' bed, and it might have been successful if that damn bedside table hadn't gotten in her way. FYI Chris and Jin: Head wounds bleed like a mutha!

Hypothetical question

So....

If I were to maybe let another dog hang out around the house, you know, because I'm lonely and bored since Scott's gone, what kind should it be?

Hypothetically speaking and all...

She clearly spends too much time with me

(coming from somewhere in the back of the van)

CRASH!!!

"What the hell was that?"

"MAMA!  Skylar said HELL!"

Why you won't see video of Haley's Christmas show

"Daddy, the video of Haley's class singing is really shaky, and that video camera has image stabilization on it."

"Yeah, the girl in front of me kept bending over and she had one of those tramp stamp tattoos. It kept throwing me off."

Feeding time

Tell the truth, CAN YOU STAND THE EXCITEMENT? CAN YOU HANG? IS IT TOO MUCH?
I'm beginning to see who "the life of the party" is in my marriage.
And it's not me.

Say it loud, say it proud

I'm going to say this, and I'm not the least bit embarrassed. 

THAT MINIVAN IS FREAKIN' AWESOME.

Seriously, everyone should go out and get themselves a minivan right now.  No matter how many kids you have, if you only have one kid, or even if you don't have any kids, the minivan is the vehicle for you.  Hell, minivans should be the only kind of car anybody makes anymore, they are that fabulous.  And I'm not pushing brands or anything, so get whichever one you want, but mine is pretty dang sweet, so if you're asking my opinion, get one like this.

And I don't care what anybody thinks about me driving a minivan.  Though I do feel I have a small degree of awesomeness, I'm not cool, I don't pretend to be cool, and I don't want to be cool (if it means giving up my minivan).  If anything, having a minivan has made me even more awesome, because it's awesomeness rubs off on my when I ride around in it.  And gas?  Oh my gosh, $27 filled it all the way up.  We won't even talk about what it cost to put gas in my Expedition.  

It all comes down to the fact that this van makes my life better, much like my beloved cell phone does.  It will make your life better too.  So go get one.  You'll thank me for it.       

Christmas Parade 2008

This year we were lucky enough to be able to attend the Rome Christmas Parade.  I have held off talking about it even though there were a few floats that I definitely needed to address on here, mainly to back up the fact that SHE IS NOT MARRYING HIM.  Now, after several weeks of heavy prayer, Jax is history.  Say it with me people, THANK YOU, JESUS.      

I would like to say that every church in Rome, GA (and there are about a million since this is the bible belt and all) had a float in the parade.  I took a picture of every one of them, but they all looked pretty much alike and not a single one was particularly remarkable so I won't bore you with them.  Also, just about every high school had a band participating, and I'm not posting pics of them either.  Everybody has seen a band before, so there's no point.  I'm just gonna pick a few of the more interesting ones and share those.

Firstly, I give you Brian and Claire, voted "Most Photogenic" at the Christmas Parade this year. 

These are a small group of pictures that prove that all you had to have in order to be allowed to participate in the parade is enough money to cover the entrance fee.

Cloggers!  They had cloggers in the parade.  Clogging is big time down here.  There was a guy in my high school, I think his name was Lamar, and every year in the talent show he would clog.  And even though everyone was like "I'd never be caught dead clogging" he would always get the biggest ovation because he was absolutely awesome at it.  One year he did a cartwheel off the stage and clogged up to the back of the auditorium and the crowd had to be held back to keep from mobbing him in the aisle, it was that exciting.  (and people actually wonder why I moved away from here)  Oh, and FYI, Amanda was a clogger for like, 12 years or something.  And she honestly believes she's coming over on Monday to sew.  We'll see about that.    

Look at the cute little cloggers!  Sometimes I feel like I missed out on certain things in my childhood.  Now is not one of those times.

I'm not going to say anything about this one.  I'm sure there is a lot to be said, but I just don't even want to address it.  

Do you recycle?  We do.  The green thing on the truck goes by the name Re-Re (really?  that's the best you could come up with?)  He came to Owen's school and terrified all the children and then he rode in the Christmas parade and terrified all the rest of the kids.  He bothers me a little.  I can't put my finger on exactly what it is, but he makes me nervous.

Here's a picture of Santa, who Skylar refuses to have anything to do with.  I told Skylar that we were putting all her passy's in her stocking and Santa would take them and leave her presents and her actual words were "I don't give a rat's ass what he leaves me, that man is not taking my passy's."  And now she won't go near him and when we see him at the mall she hides her passy behind her back.  

And here are the pictures I wanted you to see the most.  See the lady driving the tractor?  She is Jax's mom.  Look how happy she looks, up there driving a tractor in the Christmas parade.  And look at the sign on the tractor.  She's a logger.  Good grief.    

Look at this one.  The little girl driving?  The same 9 year old who was driving the kids around at the birthday party.  Driving a jacked up power wheels in the Christmas parade.     

Oh, and here's the rest of the family.  See, they're waving right at me, because they recognize me from the birthday party.  We're tight like that now. 

I told all of you how bad it was, and nobody believed me.  You all want to laugh but you've got kids who are going to pull this same kind of shit one day and who's gonna be laughing then?  Huh?  ME! 

How do I always get myself into these situations? I'm lucky that way I guess. Like the time I took Haley to a birthday party in Texas and we were the only white people there and they played Jay-Z really loud and had a dance-off and Haley won.  It's mind-boggling.  Maybe for Christmas I'll get some Calgon.

Close only counts when you play with hand grenades

This morning Skylar and I were at the Floyd Hospital outpatient surgery center bright-eyed and bushy tailed at 6am so she could get tubes put in her ears and her adnoids taken out.  Skylar does not come out of anesthesia well, instead she comes out screaming and throwing punches in all directions.  That was fun!

As I carried Skylar, her blanket, her sippy cut, the diaper bag, my purse, and the pillow from the hospital bed (which Skylar was not leaving without no way no how) to the van I pushed the button on the remote, the door slid open immediately, and I was able to plop Skylar into her seat.  Then, with a light touch of the handle the door began sliding closed again, I jumped in the front seat, hit the butt warmer button and was ready to go with practically no physical effort on my part.  We got to the house, and before I got out I hit the button and the side door began to open.  By the time I got out and shut my door, Skylar's door was fully open and I was able to reach right in and get her.  Then, another light touch of the handle and the door finished closing while I was opening up the front door on the house.  You could get really fat driving a van like this, as you burn practically zero calories because you don't do anything.  

It was all rather nice.

If you don't count the part about it being a MINIVAN.  

Attention

Hell froze over today.

Happy Birthday Haley!

Happy Birthday!  Now you are 8 years old and legally able to ride in the front seat of the car.  Here, let's celebrate-have a giant rat!

This is Trixie, who Haley decided was the luckiest guinea pig at Petland today, because she's the one I bought.  Um, I bet that's not what Trixie is thinking.  Trixie is more than likely thinking  "What the hell?"

We are mostly sure that Trixie is a girl, because the girl at Petland picked her up, took a look and told me "Well, I guess it's a girl because I don't see any balls."  And I was too shocked at her wordage to be offended, kind of like yesterday, when Jenny used the word "sharted" to describe what had taken place in my house while I wasn't there.  

Trixie is a big hit here of course, and she hasn't peed on anybody (yet) and she hasn't bitten anybody (yet) and we only had one scare when Skylar squeezed her head and she made a noise that sounds a lot like the sound Heidi makes when you accidentally step on her foot.  Honestly, I give this thing 2 weeks, 3 tops.  And if she ever gets away from us it's all over but the crying, because I'm telling you what, this thing can scoot.  It took 20 minutes for me to catch her earlier and she was in a 10x15 cage.  

This might go down in history as the best birthday present ever in our house.  Well, until February anyway, when Ashlyn's rolls around....hint hint-it's gonna be big!  When Scott's away, I BUY ANIMALS.

Exactly

Making memories

(Not the best thing to hear coming from the living room)

"Look out, Skylar, FIRE IN THE HOLE!!!"