Fine. Where have you guys been?
Mama took us to the vet to find out what's wrong with Dixie.
What did they say?
Well, she's gonna be fine, but she's got "the heat" so they've got to fix her.
What? The heat? What do you mean she's got "the heat?"
No, not the heat, she's in heat.
So she's just hot?
No, she-
Well that makes perfect sense. I mean, she meows all the time and rolls around and she's got all that fur. It MUST mean she's just really hot. It's been hot lately you know.
No, it has nothing to do with her being hot.
They are gonna fix her next week. The doctor told Mama that until then we needed to stick a q-tip in Dixie's vulva. But I have no idea what that is.
What's a vulva?
(silence)
It must be one of those things we're not supposed to talk about. You know. Like SEX.
HALEY!
What?
Talk about something else.
So you're not going to tell us what a vulva is?
NO.
(silence)
Mama? What's a hickey?
3 comments:
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! :-) I'm so not looking forward to these talks.
I'm not gonna lie, I really hope my kids are this hilarious when they get older. If my kids were to ask me what a vulva was, I'd crack up and then tell them it was a type of car.
1030am here. I'm gonna go have a drink for you...
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