My talk about the birds and bees

Yesterday I took Ashlyn to the eye doctor to get some contacts.  Yes, she is a little on the youngish side for contacts, but her eyes are getting worse very very quickly and the eye doctor thinks that contacts is the best way to slow it down.  So we got some toric lenses, for her astigmatism and whatnot, and I paid out of pocket because I am the only person in America that Tricare doesn't seem to work for.  It seems their system was down so they couldn't verify something they needed to verify and my referral wasn't good enough, it only works for all the other people who get them and blah blah blah kiss my ass, here's your stupid $200.  While we were waiting Ashlyn was reading People magazine.

"Mama, look!"  And she shows me a picture with the caption:  Jamie Lynn Spears Pregnant at 16

I have been very careful to shield this little tidbit of info from Ashlyn, as she is more of a thinker than Haley, and I knew there would be questions.  She watches Zoey 101 though (and boy is that show unrealistic), so she knew immediately who it was.  

"How do you get pregnant when you are 16?"

"Uh, the same way you get pregnant when you are 30."

"Well, how's that?"

"How about I tell you when you are 30?"

"You said you get married and then God gives you a baby.  Is she married?"

"No, she's not married."

"So how did she get pregnant?"

"Uh...Hey!!  Are you excited about getting contacts or what?"