"Small surgical procedure"

In her ongoing effort to shock and amaze the medical community with not only the sheer volume of her ER visits but also their often obscure nature, Haley has managed to injure herself with the back to her earring.

Yes, the back to her earring is inside her earlobe. And by inside I mean not able to be seen from the outside, however it shows up really well on the x-ray. Oh yeah, the x-ray. We had taken. Of her earlobe. Apparently the first x-ray in the history of the hospital of an earlobe. The people didn't even know how to position her head.

It all started with a trip to the clinic on post to see if they could get it out. I figured it went in through the little hole (the hole is no different in size from any other pierced ear, that's the beauty of this) so it would come out of the little hole. She wouldn't let me mess with it so I picked up Scott so he could pin her down while the doctor took it out. Well the doctor on post said we needed to go to the ER because they didn't know what to do. Still, somewhere in my little mind I thought they would be able to just pop it out.

At the ER they thought the back was in her ear canal. After explaining that it was in the earlobe we were hit with a barrage of questions: What type of back? Was it metal? Were we absolutely sure it was metal? Were we positive it wasn't plastic? How did it get in there? How long had it been there? Did it hurt? Was it bleeding?
This is when I started to develop a headache.

At x-ray it took 4 people to figure out how to position her head and where to put the camera. Then they asked me if there was any way possible I might be pregnant.
This is when my head started to throb and my vision blurred a little bit.

After it was determined that the x-ray was successful (ecstatic shouts of "We got it!!" and congratulations all around) we were sent back to the ER. The doctor came in and told us that no, it wasn't a cyst, it was in fact an earring back and after examining her ear he said that he'd been an ER doctor since 1985 and he'd never seen this before. Never even heard of anything like this. And for goodness's sake he didn't know what in the world to do so we needed to see an ENT doctor today. We were to call the doctor and tell them Haley had a "foreign body" embedded in her earlobe that needed to be removed and they would probably set up a "small surgical procedure" in which Haley would be "unconscious".
At this point I swear to God I felt 5 of the hairs on my head turn gray.

So we're going in today at 11:30 for further assessment. And it should be fun fun fun!